how could i ever have doubted you
your providence and wisdom amaze me
you knew what was best
you had a plan
it is so much better, so much greater
you know what i need
and orchestrate my life so that those things occur
not the things i want, necessarily
hindsight is 20/20
i can see why
i understand and am humbled and amazed
you never promised it would be easy
quite the opposite
i asked for it
i needed it
and after all is said and done
i am thankful for it
and for you
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Scoreboard of Catan
Thursday, February 26, 2004
its time i gave up and gave in
its time to move on
and leave it all behind
i cant let this drag me down
it isnt worth it
i have known love
and love has known me
i was unaware
it has always been waiting for me
to just turn around
and receive it
that is the true love
that i now know
john 15:13-14
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
its time to move on
and leave it all behind
i cant let this drag me down
it isnt worth it
i have known love
and love has known me
i was unaware
it has always been waiting for me
to just turn around
and receive it
that is the true love
that i now know
john 15:13-14
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Monday, February 23, 2004
some interesting quotes from a frequently ignored speech by Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. (4 April 1967)
needless to say, this is a side of King's political opinions that is not highly publicized. I thought it was interesting. i know, quite a different type of posting than usual.
"Even when pressed by the demands of inner truth, men do not easily assume the task of opposing their government's policy...Nor does the human spirit move without great difficulty against all the apathy of conformist thought within one's own bosom and in the surrounding world..."
"Some of us who have already begun to break the silence of the night have found that the calling to speak is often a vocation of agony, but we must speak."
"I come to this platform tonight to make a passionate plea to my beloved nation."
"I knew that America would never invest the necessary funds or energies in rehabilitation of its poor so long as adventures like Vietnam continued to draw men and skills and money like some demonic destructive suction tube"
"So we have been repeatedly faced with the cruel irony of watching Negro and white boys on TV screens as they kill and die together for a nation that has been unable to seat them together in the same schools"
"I knew that I could never again raise my voice against the violence of the oppressed in the ghettos without having first spoken clearly to the greatest purveyor of violence in the world today -- my own government. For the sake of those boys, for the sake of this government, for the sake of hundreds of thousands trembling under our violence, I cannot be silent."
"When machines and computers, profit motives and property rights, are considered more important than people, the giant triplets of racism, extreme materialism, and militarism are incapable of being conquered."
"True compassion is more than flinging a coin to a beggar. It comes to see that an edifice which produces beggars needs restructuring."
his speech was not well-liked. conspiracy theory holds that he was assassinated on that date a year later (April 4th 1968) because of his views.
no comment....
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
needless to say, this is a side of King's political opinions that is not highly publicized. I thought it was interesting. i know, quite a different type of posting than usual.
"Even when pressed by the demands of inner truth, men do not easily assume the task of opposing their government's policy...Nor does the human spirit move without great difficulty against all the apathy of conformist thought within one's own bosom and in the surrounding world..."
"Some of us who have already begun to break the silence of the night have found that the calling to speak is often a vocation of agony, but we must speak."
"I come to this platform tonight to make a passionate plea to my beloved nation."
"I knew that America would never invest the necessary funds or energies in rehabilitation of its poor so long as adventures like Vietnam continued to draw men and skills and money like some demonic destructive suction tube"
"So we have been repeatedly faced with the cruel irony of watching Negro and white boys on TV screens as they kill and die together for a nation that has been unable to seat them together in the same schools"
"I knew that I could never again raise my voice against the violence of the oppressed in the ghettos without having first spoken clearly to the greatest purveyor of violence in the world today -- my own government. For the sake of those boys, for the sake of this government, for the sake of hundreds of thousands trembling under our violence, I cannot be silent."
"When machines and computers, profit motives and property rights, are considered more important than people, the giant triplets of racism, extreme materialism, and militarism are incapable of being conquered."
"True compassion is more than flinging a coin to a beggar. It comes to see that an edifice which produces beggars needs restructuring."
his speech was not well-liked. conspiracy theory holds that he was assassinated on that date a year later (April 4th 1968) because of his views.
no comment....
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Wednesday, February 18, 2004
the clock on the wall sees everything...
it's just ticking away
God does not give us overcoming life, He gives us life as we overcome
A human being is capable of depression, otherwise there would be no capacity for exaltation
"many cases might occur in which one would have need of the love and sympathy of others, and in which...he would deprive himself of all hope of the aid he desires" -Immanuel Kant
"human beings generall have lost the possibility in fact; indeed, their knowledge of their authenticity is falsified by being tied up with the opinion that they have control over it." -Rudolf Bultmann
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
it's just ticking away
God does not give us overcoming life, He gives us life as we overcome
A human being is capable of depression, otherwise there would be no capacity for exaltation
"many cases might occur in which one would have need of the love and sympathy of others, and in which...he would deprive himself of all hope of the aid he desires" -Immanuel Kant
"human beings generall have lost the possibility in fact; indeed, their knowledge of their authenticity is falsified by being tied up with the opinion that they have control over it." -Rudolf Bultmann
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Sunday, February 15, 2004
words all too familiar, forever repeated.
more voices attempt to affirm
yet they only add doubt
the truth has since left that statement
the hope and happiness and joy,
future reward escapes once again
with repetition only comes pain
i thought i had finally answered
it had been given
the gift anticipated and predicted prayerfully
yet not. and if not then when? where? how?
-insert Sunday school answer here-
in all honesty, doubt and loneliness are the products
of an encouraging word intended to love and care
the thought is appreciated
thanks for caring
if only you knew how many times i have heard that
and the difference between what it used to mean
and what it means now
not your fault
i just hope your right
cause its not up to me
with every day more lonesome doubt
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
more voices attempt to affirm
yet they only add doubt
the truth has since left that statement
the hope and happiness and joy,
future reward escapes once again
with repetition only comes pain
i thought i had finally answered
it had been given
the gift anticipated and predicted prayerfully
yet not. and if not then when? where? how?
-insert Sunday school answer here-
in all honesty, doubt and loneliness are the products
of an encouraging word intended to love and care
the thought is appreciated
thanks for caring
if only you knew how many times i have heard that
and the difference between what it used to mean
and what it means now
not your fault
i just hope your right
cause its not up to me
with every day more lonesome doubt
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
new way of dealing with valentine's day: serving in humility
well....among other ways.
and no, it couldnt get more depressing than delivering flowers to girls on valentine's day while riding in a mini-van by yourself listening to an Oldies station that is only playing love songs... on top of the obvious fact that you have no one to give anything to or spend time with in a special or intimate setting, which you are constantly reminded of by everyone around you, either by word or deed. im glad its over. the loathing has increased. i know....apparently that was possible...who knew?
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
well....among other ways.
and no, it couldnt get more depressing than delivering flowers to girls on valentine's day while riding in a mini-van by yourself listening to an Oldies station that is only playing love songs... on top of the obvious fact that you have no one to give anything to or spend time with in a special or intimate setting, which you are constantly reminded of by everyone around you, either by word or deed. im glad its over. the loathing has increased. i know....apparently that was possible...who knew?
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Wednesday, February 11, 2004
every single word I said
would come out insightful or brave or smooth or charming
and you'd want to call me
but for now I'll look so longingly
waiting...
for you to want me, for you need me, for you to notice me
let’s just watch the tides they grow
the wind is coming from the side
we are sleeping in the light
feel like waking up in your house some day
part of me does
cant say it will ever be the same
cant say i want it to be
i know i wont be the same
it wont be a full recovery
we've said what was needed
but definitely not all
some will just rest inside
never to come out
afraid what form they might take
i wont try to hurt you
despite vindication and retaliation
i once felt i needed and wanted
so badly
dont know where we go
dont know what i do
but im sure ill figure it out
until then
i still sleep with the lights on
i still stay up late alone
i still have regrets overshadowed
when i first came to know you, you raised me up
yet again, you prove your faithfulness
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
would come out insightful or brave or smooth or charming
and you'd want to call me
but for now I'll look so longingly
waiting...
for you to want me, for you need me, for you to notice me
let’s just watch the tides they grow
the wind is coming from the side
we are sleeping in the light
feel like waking up in your house some day
part of me does
cant say it will ever be the same
cant say i want it to be
i know i wont be the same
it wont be a full recovery
we've said what was needed
but definitely not all
some will just rest inside
never to come out
afraid what form they might take
i wont try to hurt you
despite vindication and retaliation
i once felt i needed and wanted
so badly
dont know where we go
dont know what i do
but im sure ill figure it out
until then
i still sleep with the lights on
i still stay up late alone
i still have regrets overshadowed
when i first came to know you, you raised me up
yet again, you prove your faithfulness
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Sunday, February 08, 2004
anxious, i wait
not happily anticipating
disturbed spirit
the blood rush
heart races
para- to sympathetic
confident to uneasy
peace and joy
to rage, anger and disgust
i wont back down
it wont be easy
i never said i would be alone
i wont be able to make it if i am
the tests are coming
the supports have been raised
the hand of grace and peace
rests on my shoulder
my knees are getting sore....
wouldnt have it any other way though
"without humility there can be no humanity" - John Buchan
Parvum parva decent
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
not happily anticipating
disturbed spirit
the blood rush
heart races
para- to sympathetic
confident to uneasy
peace and joy
to rage, anger and disgust
i wont back down
it wont be easy
i never said i would be alone
i wont be able to make it if i am
the tests are coming
the supports have been raised
the hand of grace and peace
rests on my shoulder
my knees are getting sore....
wouldnt have it any other way though
"without humility there can be no humanity" - John Buchan
Parvum parva decent
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Not much for conversation, I still find need to pray.
Sometimes I get tired of walking through these ordinary days.
If nothing else I get to see you even if we never speak.
The harm of words is sometimes we don't quite know what they really mean.
i dont know where
i dont know how
i dont know why
but your love can make these things better...
your love does make these things better
you are all i have to hold on to
soul was restless for redemption
feet were lookin' for a place to stand
well, i ain’t got no life
and you know i ain’t got no money
just the faith of an empty hand
amazing grace, i feel you comin' up slowly now
like the sun is risin', heat on my face
oh, love that keeps on shinin', don’t let the shadow come
you know i gotta feel your healin' rays
and a hush falls over the room
a silent salute...
filled with the love i havent earned
i dont deserve it
but i need it more than ever
it is all that keeps me going
you are the fire in my veins
you are the warmth in my heart
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Sometimes I get tired of walking through these ordinary days.
If nothing else I get to see you even if we never speak.
The harm of words is sometimes we don't quite know what they really mean.
i dont know where
i dont know how
i dont know why
but your love can make these things better...
your love does make these things better
you are all i have to hold on to
soul was restless for redemption
feet were lookin' for a place to stand
well, i ain’t got no life
and you know i ain’t got no money
just the faith of an empty hand
amazing grace, i feel you comin' up slowly now
like the sun is risin', heat on my face
oh, love that keeps on shinin', don’t let the shadow come
you know i gotta feel your healin' rays
and a hush falls over the room
a silent salute...
filled with the love i havent earned
i dont deserve it
but i need it more than ever
it is all that keeps me going
you are the fire in my veins
you are the warmth in my heart
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Saturday, February 07, 2004
I stand out like a spoon with a bunch of forks
or like Shaq hangin' out with a bunch of dwarves,
don't fit in anywhere 'cause I'm not your normal average ordinary regular person,
I've made a choice not to conform
such joy
its unspeakable
its unfathomable
but its wonderful
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
or like Shaq hangin' out with a bunch of dwarves,
don't fit in anywhere 'cause I'm not your normal average ordinary regular person,
I've made a choice not to conform
such joy
its unspeakable
its unfathomable
but its wonderful
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
the shuffle was toggled
arent you supposed to be random?
how is this random?
how is this what you come up with?
how could this possibly be the first song that comes up out of over 1500 songs?
not so much how, but why!?
why did you have to bring up the song which will torment and torture me for years....again
i thought i had moved on from those days
i thought i knew better
i thought i had been there and had come out on top
i never thought i would need it again
i didnt think it would sing to my heart
i didnt want to have to feel that again
but here i am
the random selection picks the most dreaded of all on the playlist
what can i do but move on
i will not let this pull me down
it isnt worth it anymore
where will i be when i stop wondering why
and for the million hours that we were
well I'll smile and remember it all
then I'll turn and go
while your story's completed mine is a long way from done
relying fervently and completely...
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
arent you supposed to be random?
how is this random?
how is this what you come up with?
how could this possibly be the first song that comes up out of over 1500 songs?
not so much how, but why!?
why did you have to bring up the song which will torment and torture me for years....again
i thought i had moved on from those days
i thought i knew better
i thought i had been there and had come out on top
i never thought i would need it again
i didnt think it would sing to my heart
i didnt want to have to feel that again
but here i am
the random selection picks the most dreaded of all on the playlist
what can i do but move on
i will not let this pull me down
it isnt worth it anymore
where will i be when i stop wondering why
and for the million hours that we were
well I'll smile and remember it all
then I'll turn and go
while your story's completed mine is a long way from done
relying fervently and completely...
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Friday, February 06, 2004
If you twist and turn away
If you tear yourself in two again
If I could, yes I would
If I could, I would
Let it go
Surrender
Dislocate
If I could throw this
Lifeless lifeline to the wind
Leave this heart of clay
See you walk, walk away
Into the night
And through the rain
Into the half-light
And through the flame
If I could through myself
Set your spirit free
I’d lead your heart away
See you break, break away
Into the light
And to the day
To let it go
And so fade away
Wide awake
I’m not sleeping
If you should ask then maybe they’d
Tell you what I would say
True colors fly in blue and black
Bruised silken sky and burning flag
Colors crash, collide in blood shot eyes
If I could, you know I would
Let it go...
This desperation
Dislocation
Separation
Condemnation
Revelation
In temptation
Isolation
Desolation
Let it go
And so fade away
in its place, fraternity and love...
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
If you tear yourself in two again
If I could, yes I would
If I could, I would
Let it go
Surrender
Dislocate
If I could throw this
Lifeless lifeline to the wind
Leave this heart of clay
See you walk, walk away
Into the night
And through the rain
Into the half-light
And through the flame
If I could through myself
Set your spirit free
I’d lead your heart away
See you break, break away
Into the light
And to the day
To let it go
And so fade away
Wide awake
I’m not sleeping
If you should ask then maybe they’d
Tell you what I would say
True colors fly in blue and black
Bruised silken sky and burning flag
Colors crash, collide in blood shot eyes
If I could, you know I would
Let it go...
This desperation
Dislocation
Separation
Condemnation
Revelation
In temptation
Isolation
Desolation
Let it go
And so fade away
in its place, fraternity and love...
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Thursday, February 05, 2004
tear it down
all that i have
all that means anything to me
take it away
pile it up and burn
then there will be room
there are many wounds to heal
i dont want you to cover scars
i want you to heal the cause
there are trials ahead
much like the trials behind
you have always been there
you have always held me close
in these trials i may be stabbed in the back
i may be spit upon or beaten
i may fall and be dragged through the dust
the sand will stick to my tear-soaked cheeks
the blood will pool and dry
i will collapse an cry
be with me
hold me
be my hope to carry on
as i pick up the pieces
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
all that i have
all that means anything to me
take it away
pile it up and burn
then there will be room
there are many wounds to heal
i dont want you to cover scars
i want you to heal the cause
there are trials ahead
much like the trials behind
you have always been there
you have always held me close
in these trials i may be stabbed in the back
i may be spit upon or beaten
i may fall and be dragged through the dust
the sand will stick to my tear-soaked cheeks
the blood will pool and dry
i will collapse an cry
be with me
hold me
be my hope to carry on
as i pick up the pieces
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
tear it down
all that i have
all that means anything to me
take it away
pile it up and burn
then there will be room
there are many wounds to heal
i dont want you to cover scars
i want you to heal the cause
there are trials ahead
much like the trials behind
you have always been there
you have always held me close
in these trials i may be stabbed in the back
i may be spit upon or beaten
i may fall and be dragged through the dust
the sand will stick to my tear-soaked cheeks
the blood will pool and dry
i will collapse an cry
be with me
hold me
be my hope to carry on
as i pick up the pieces
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
all that i have
all that means anything to me
take it away
pile it up and burn
then there will be room
there are many wounds to heal
i dont want you to cover scars
i want you to heal the cause
there are trials ahead
much like the trials behind
you have always been there
you have always held me close
in these trials i may be stabbed in the back
i may be spit upon or beaten
i may fall and be dragged through the dust
the sand will stick to my tear-soaked cheeks
the blood will pool and dry
i will collapse an cry
be with me
hold me
be my hope to carry on
as i pick up the pieces
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Tuesday, February 03, 2004
the hardest thing ive ever had to say happened to be one of the shortest
but it still took me almost an hour to spit out what i was really thinking and feeling
its not easy to say no
regret may be around the corner
but i think it was the right thing nonetheless
its not easy to say no
especially to you
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
but it still took me almost an hour to spit out what i was really thinking and feeling
its not easy to say no
regret may be around the corner
but i think it was the right thing nonetheless
its not easy to say no
especially to you
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Monday, February 02, 2004
And I know you bore our sorrows
And I know you feel our pain
And I know it would not hurt any less
Even if it could be explained
And I know that I am only lashing out
At the One who loves me most
And after I figured this, somehow
All I really need to know
Is if You who live in eternity
Hear the prayers of those of us who live in time
We can't see what's ahead
And we can not get free of what we've left behind
I'm reeling from these voices that keep screaming in my ears
All the words of shame and doubt, blame and regret
I can't see how You're leading me unless You've led me here
Where I'm lost enough to let myself be led
And so You've been here all along I guess
It's just Your ways and You are just playing hard to get
For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our etes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
i am pressed but not crushed,
persecuted, not abandoned
struck down but not destroyed
on this law he meditates day and night...
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
And I know you feel our pain
And I know it would not hurt any less
Even if it could be explained
And I know that I am only lashing out
At the One who loves me most
And after I figured this, somehow
All I really need to know
Is if You who live in eternity
Hear the prayers of those of us who live in time
We can't see what's ahead
And we can not get free of what we've left behind
I'm reeling from these voices that keep screaming in my ears
All the words of shame and doubt, blame and regret
I can't see how You're leading me unless You've led me here
Where I'm lost enough to let myself be led
And so You've been here all along I guess
It's just Your ways and You are just playing hard to get
For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our etes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
i am pressed but not crushed,
persecuted, not abandoned
struck down but not destroyed
on this law he meditates day and night...
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
Sunday, February 01, 2004
once a man thinks he stands upright and secure
then must he be careful
for then shall he fall
If the Lord delights in a man's way, he makes his steps firm;
though he stumble, he will not fall,
for the Lord upholds him with his hand.
psalm 37:23-24
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
then must he be careful
for then shall he fall
If the Lord delights in a man's way, he makes his steps firm;
though he stumble, he will not fall,
for the Lord upholds him with his hand.
psalm 37:23-24
any and all comments or responses are welcome at dabele@wm.edu
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