Things I learned on my trip to California:

babies shouldn't be allowed to ride on airplanes. I dont care how well behaved you think your kid is, they will still freak out and cry for the whole trip and make everyone else's life a living hell. be considerate, take a train or a car ride or something. how about you just decide not to travel for the first couple years after having a child, or just leave them at a relative's house or something.

carry on luggage doesn't have feelings or get tired. so why do people insist on taking up perfectly good seats in the airport to put their bags on? trust me, your bags will be fine sitting on the floor. their feelings wont be hurt, they will rest there just fine. whereas a person has a right and a need for that seat, especially in an airport where people are tired and hate travelling. make them less cranky, give them a seat to rest in. then maybe they wont be such asses when they sit next to you on the plane and wont have to order five drinks.

airplane tickets should be all-inclusive. who the hell decided that the price of a plane ticket isnt enough money to get me food on said plane ride? am i not spending enough money to get a snack during the flight? and no, i do not mean that horrible little packet of crap snack Fiesta Snack Mix, which tastes horrible and mocks me with its inability to satisfy my hunger. and then you walk around with your boxes of crap that you are charging $5 for. that is retarded. i pay all this money for a plane ticket and then i have to pay more for food to eat on the flight? ridiculous. how about you give me the box and i will refrain from punching you in the face?

california is evil. it really is the center and epitome of everything that is horrible and wrong with this country, and possibly our entire human race. for all their environmentalist (pussy) liberal talk, they are the most irrational and overly consumption-orineted population in America. everyone with their million dollar homes and 6-figure cars, no one carpooling, everyone driving themselves, no one really caring about the environment. i mean if they did, they wouldnt just drink jamba juice and sit around in drum circles singing songs about the evils of oil and the government, they would actually drive a hybrid car or carpool or push for the refurbishing of public transportation. I mean, that is what makes Europe different from the rest of the world, isn't it? Their public transportation is amazing. and all their cars are tiny and efficient. Practical. Freaking california. I mean for being the "crazy state" and the most-progressive, or whatever, i sure did see lots of signs that you are just a spoiled, overly-self-indulgant group of asses. but that is just my opinion.

the Beach Boys were wrong. in no way do i wish they all could be California girls. No way. i found out that the general California stereotype for any girl from the East Coast, or I guess anywhere that isnt California, is that they are "homely." Not a very flattering description. But then again, the stereotype of all California girls is the fake, plastic surgery, too much make up, spoiled rich kid, BMW driving, deginer clothing dressed, chihuahua toting, ditsy, superficial, drama queen bitches that you see on OC or Laguna Beach. so if the Beach Boys wish that all the Georgia girls, Virginia girls, midwest girls, and Texas girls could all be California girls, I will have to disagree with them. Please, reject the desire to be like the slinky girls you see on the OC. be yourself. have some definition and character in and of yourself. why would i be interested in someone that looks like everyone else, just a face in the crowd, a sheep in the herd? unless you are counting on the fact that all guys wish they could have a California pop-celeb-slut for a girlfriend, which isnt true. it is like going to a hooker dressed as marilyn monroe (L.A. Confidential, conincidentally). be different, be unique. dont listen to california and try to be like them. it is like selling your birthrite. it is insulting that the Beach Boys would convince the women of America subliminally that they should all be California girls and that is the only way they will ever be attractive to men. ludicrous.


but above all, the thing i really learned in California is this:
friends are worth it.
whatever it is, wherever it is, whoever it is, a good friendship is worth keeping. it takes effort and time and energy and money to maintain a friendship, especially when it is strained by changes in lifestyle and location and availability, but making the commitment to keeping that relationship going is invaluable. I could make a Mastercard commercial about my trip to California.

Plane tickets: $318
Food: $20
Meals, gas, movie tickets, comedy show tickets, and some drinks: all paid for by Benji
Travelling across the country to see a best friend: priceless

something like that. as Baz Luhrmann quoted in his song "Everybody's Free To Wear Sunscreen":
Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.


memories made.